Watching nature take its course, from the top of a hill in northern England

Will the Real Police Inspector Gadget Please Stand Up


On Meeting fellow blogger and author of Perverting the Course of Justice, Police Inspector Gadget

Like all texts and emails from Inspector Gadget, it told me all I needed to know without the waste of a single key stroke. “Will be in the Dog and Duck from 2pm”. Gadget and I have been reading each other’s blogs for a couple of years now and bat the odd email about. His emails, like text messages are direct, but never curt. But after this length of time there is no doubt in my mind that he is a guy who says what he thinks and leads from the front.

So after a bit of a tussle with my sat-nav, I found the Dog and Duck, a chocolate box pretty pub deep in the heart of Ruralshire and whilst the pub’s location might have been a mystery to my sat-nav, it obviously wasn’t to the rest of Ruralshire.   There were any number of families in the beer garden who might be Gadget, Debbie and the kids; the simple fact was, I didn’t have a clue who I was looking for. The obvious solution would have been to ring him, except there was no mobile network. My heart sank a little.  I really didn’t fancy walking into the pub looking for “a man I met on the Internet”, and “err, no, I don’t know what he looks like, but I would recognise his dog, Kibblechops”. In the end it wasn’t coppers nouse that rescued me from my predicament, nor was it Kibblechops (as somewhat unhelpfully he was asleep under the table). No, it was Debbie’s feminine intuition that saved the day for it was she who spotted me.

I had a mental list of questions as long as my arm about what it’s like living a life with the Police Inspector’s Blog (and if you found your way here via Gadgets blog. I’d be curious to know what you would ask him, should you find yourself down the pub with him on a late summer’s afternoon). Reading the blog and the book

Waiting Manchester Piccadilly

you could be forgiven for expecting to meet Gadget the angry man (goodness knows, there’s plenty to be angry about), but I knew from the emails there was far more to him than that. For a start there’s Gadget the family man, a justifiably proud dad, for the young Gadgets, Vera, Dave and Chuck, really are kids to be proud of (and amongst their many talents, they are experts at catching wasps in empty beer glasses) and I can tell you that Vera is very pretty. She has Debbie’s eyes; any boyfriends she brings home are going to need to scrub up nicely to meet with her dad’s approval.

Gadget has mentioned before that Kibblechops is besotted with Debbie. He’s right, that dog never takes his eyes off Debbie for a moment.  If she is out of the room, he has one ear cocked, listening for her laughter and when she returns he ripples with delight. I suspect that even when he is asleep he is dreaming of her.

When we were eventually outnumbered by wasps we retired to the Gadget home for ‘tea and biscuits’ (is there a metaphor for modern policing in that line?) With Dave and Chuck volunteering to show me the way, I was very glad of their guidance as the meandering route would have left my sat-nav speechless.  En- route Dave told me what it’s like being the teenage son of a police inspector and sharing your home with an awful lot of T-shirts.

All too soon and after a lot of laughter and a myriad of topics discussed including our mutual blog reading list, our worries about Jokers creaky joints and looking forward to reading Tom Reynolds new book, it was time for me to be back on the road again.  So when I managed to get out of deepest Ruralshire and the sat-nav went from a barking sergeant major, Left, Right, Left, Right, LEFT into a moody adolescent sulk and I had time to think about the afternoon, I realised that whilst I had gained answers to a lot of my questions, I’d come away with a whole load more.  Not only that, I hadn’t asked one of the most important questions on my original list; would Gadget and Debbie want Vera Dave and Chuck, to join the police when they grow up?

Author: uphilldowndale

Watching the rhythm of rural life, from the top of a hill in northern England. Having spent most of my life avoiding writing, I now need to do it! I am no domestic goddess, but if I were expecting visitors to my home, I would whisk round with the duster and plump up the cushions and generally make the place look presentable. I hope that by putting my words where others may see them it will encourage me to ‘tidy up and push the Hoover around’ my writing. On the other hand I may just be adding to the compost heap. Only time will tell! Pull up a chair, sit yourself down, I’ll put the kettle on.

26 thoughts on “Will the Real Police Inspector Gadget Please Stand Up

  1. I have not been on your fab blog for ages [pressure of farm etc]and as usual your pics and topical topics entrance. I must get the camera as you advised and get going.. but I seem to have no spare minutes even to blog at the mo… keep it up.

  2. oh my, oh my, oh my! i cannot believe that my humble blog was mentioned at a meeting of such great and famous bloggists! i am deeply flattered and grateful. and do they make the t-shirts in lurcher sizes? as you know, <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/jokerthelurcher/2183630562/&quot;i am a dog of sartorial splendour.

  3. oh my, oh my, oh my! i cannot believe that my humble blog was mentioned at a meeting of such great and famous bloggists! i am deeply flattered and grateful. and do they make the t-shirts in lurcher sizes? as you know, I am a dog of sartorial splendour.

  4. ps – i am however a dog who has forgotten how to do the code for a hyperlink…

  5. I followed the link for Inspector Gadget’s blog this time. And was fairly depressed after reading it. Then, however, I followed a link on his blog for Mr Chalk the Teacher. That blog was really depressing! I had forgotten so much about teaching in a comprehensive. Must remember never to go back!

  6. Glad you and Gadget managed to meet for a chat, you’re both doing far better than me as I’ve friends I’ve known online for over a decade and never met… well now the Atlantic gets in the way but this wasn’t always the case. My question for the Gadget clan would be based around comparing notes with the kids with my own experiences of growing up as a copper’s son (well the son of a Senior area Officer in the Specials), I’d also ask if the radios still chatter in the same way as the good old days, or has digital communications robbed them of their musical bleeps and squelches.

  7. Satisfactory. Additional evidence, should any be needed, that bloggers can be Real People after all. (And real dogs, of course.)

  8. bardsworld – the new Airwaves system produces it’s own unique set of musical beeps and strange sounds, depending how you have your set fixed up. On F Division, Ruralshire Constabulary the radio chatter is constant.

  9. Boy! Are you ever going to get alot more traffic on your Blog now… “The Gadget Effect”.

    Did you meet the famous “Battlecat”?

    • Bill the busiest day this blog has ever had was when Mr Uhdd was caught up in ‘the drama’ of last Years Original Mountain Marathon and as Gadget also linked to that post, I’ll never know if it was the Gadget effect or morbid curiosity that brought readers here in there thousands!
      This years OMM, Original mountain Marathon is next month, no doubt Mr Uhdd will be on the start line again.
      I’m rather hoping we don’t test the stats again this year.

      Battlecat was doing that aloof cat thing and was nowhere to be seen.

  10. I think that it’s great when bloggers meet up! The only one I’ve met so far was over here on holiday from Japan! xx

  11. My question for Gadget? It’s a three-parter: If he could change just one thing about modern British policing, what would it be? Why? And what difference would it make?

    As for meeting other bloggers, this always causes me much hilarity as a significant number of people believe I don’t exist and insist my blog is a hoax dreamed up for any number of weird and wonderful reasons. How could I meet them in the flesh if I’m a virtual construct and don’t actually exist?

    • I’m definitely make-believe.

    • Change one thing: get rid of the so-called National Competency Framework
      Why: because it is a farce
      What difference would it make: people could no longer bullshit their way to the top and would have to actually work instead of learning politically correct jargon.

  12. No mention of his rugged good looks?
    What about wit and charm?
    More information please!

  13. Lottie, I think Gadget can answer that question for himself!

    When I got home Mr Uhdd asked me if Gadget ‘looked like a police inspector?’ then we realised that as neither of actually know any Inspectors, it was going to make compare and contrast a little tricky!

  14. UHDD,

    That would not have been my question, but I’ve been asked it a few times in regards to my loons ….. and I will claim the 5th.

    Mine would have been (if only to see a grown man weep through disillusion) – “Why did you decide to join the Polis?”

  15. Noddy – to clean up the streets of criminall underclass swine, and make a better world for law abiding citizens. Truly. Great Blog by the way!

  16. criminal even

  17. Wow! You met Gadget. How cool. How cool for him to meet you too. Two such talented bloggers in the one place – awesome.

    I’ve been off blogging for a while so haven’t been by here (or any where else for ages) and had forgotten just how good your photos are. Really enjoyed looking through them tonight. Just brill.

  18. Pingback: Looking in the Long Grass « Uphilldowndale

  19. I’m sure he is very handsome. 😉

  20. Pingback: Hide and Seek | Uphilldowndale

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